The six months mark has come! Yahoooo! Whoopee! Yay! Hooraaa! Awesomeness! ^.^ 😀
Nakedness of purpose
This morning the thrill of the idea of sculpting with clay left me as I stood waiting for the train at the train station. I searched for that thrill internally but could not find it. All that remained was the cold, hard determination to learn the anatomy of things and people while replicating and slightly modifying the anatomy in the sculptures I will make. This state of mind is what I prayed for.
When the veneer of expectant and prospective bliss is stripped away, what is the substance of your passion?
I imagine the passing of the honeymoon stage in a romantic relationship to be the same. It’s this nakedness of purpose, this fundamental resolution to abide by your decision that, in my opinion, counts in life. It is this nakedness of purpose that undergirded my decision to be a writer instead of a scientist, to cut people who did not add any value to my existence and vice versa out of my life, to quit eating chocolates, to cut back on sugar, to quit porn and masturbation, to study Bible prophecy and church history, and many other principled decisions I have made in life. Experiencing this lack lustre, nakedness of purpose to sculpt is a good thing since it solidifies my choice. It sort of pre-empts the disappointments that will follow this course and the opposition I might experience from others.
I cannot help but see Christ requiring this same lack lustre, nakedness of purpose from us, if not a deeper kind of barrenness; to stand for the right though the heavens fall.
Today I paid for the sculpture and tree anatomy books I ordered yesterday. So I am fully committed to sculpting with clay. I also called a clay supplier and found out that they supply both hard and soft clay. I don’t know how soft the clays are but I have a pretty good idea of the degree of firmness I want. I might have to mix the two varieties. But we will see. The clay is the last thing on the list of materials I will buy last. The supplier sells clay by the kilogram at a very reasonable price. We’ll see how it goes though.
To help my colon pass the fecal matter that had me quivering, shivering, shriveling, and thank God not dribbling, on Tuesday (Day 179) I drank a glass of lemon water and two or three cups of chicory (I don’t drink coffee) throughout the day. These natural remedies in addition to prayer lifted my impedament.
A couple of days ago, I realised that the kind of leadership book I want to read and learn from is biographical in nature. I learn best by following or not following the examples set by people. That’s how my parents raised me. I do like John Maxwell’s books. They helped me a lot in the past. Basically, he states a principle, explains it and then gives an example from his own life, sport, business, politics or the Bible. I don’t have a problem with that. But what I’ve encountered in my short life here on Earth is that sometimes I’m confronted with situations that I know others have been in, am faced with many conflicting principles and leadership styles and having to choose which sets to apply. Thus having a trailblazer’s example will help guide me in what to do or what not to do.
As I write this I realise that that is exactly what Christ is. He is the Trailblazer of the Christian. And I sense that this is one dimension of what it means to acknowledge Him in all your ways (Proverbs 3:6, paraphrased). But still it would be helpful to reason that such and such thought so, do thus, and this was the outcome therefore it is best to choose this course of action for these other reasons. Anyway, the Lord knows what I need to lead people and He will put me in touch with the right resources. I just pray I have the wisdom and foresight to choose the right course of action and thought.