Right now I am tired! I’m tired of frequently checking my e-mail accounts for messages from friends and Yahoo! Answers alerts. I’m tired of checking Yahoo! Answers for interesting questions. I’m tired of searching for pictures of things I want to do. I’m tired of searching for pictures of places I’d like to go to. I’m tired of trying to read other people’s minds. I’m tired of being tired.
Another look at the reluctant leader
Today I realised that the reason why I’m so reluctant to lead is because I’m afraid that I will hurt people. I’ll be the first to admit that I’m a people pleaser and a conformist. So, being in a leadership position where I have make unpopular decisions from time to time is difficult for me. In addition to this is the expectation that leaders shouldn’t apologise much. I apologise when I’ve wronged someone whether or not it’s popular to do so.
My thoughts today have largely been centred on how I will bond with my children, when I have them one day. And my experience has been that nudity plays an important role in the bonding process. So, I basically revisited the question with a strong emphasis on adolescence, father-daughter and father-son bonding as well as the role of nudity.
Nudity, I realised as I had done before, is only a part of the equation. There are other factors that have to be taken into account and practised daily for the bond to be strong.
I look forward to the day when I become a dad. The day I really look forward to though is when my son(s) and I make box cars or build something else together. That’ll be awesome.
However, I have to get over the first hurdle. No it’s not getting a girlfriend or mustering the courage to ask her hand in marriage. It’s putting everything on the line by telling her everything about my sexual history. Will she accept me? Will she still love me the same? If she chooses to end the relationship, will she keep those things to herself?
I long to be the father of a close-knit family. That would be wonderful.