Winds of Change: Day 46

Today was good. I had a close call because of a blog post I read, but I realised that my intentions weren’t evil and I derived no sexual gratification out of what I read. In fact, what I read distressed me. It was only after I was done reading that I realised the nature of the post. And yes it involved sex but the post was about the poster regaining her sexuality after having had it taken from her by force.

It was only as I read the comments that it dawned on me that the post is similar to the examples the author of Restoring your sexuality back to biblical foundations used. My accountability partner confirmed this reasoning and is very proud of me. He says that my filter is in place and that the distress is a sign of progress. I am pleased.

My article is almost done. I will finish it and submit it in the morning. It requires some editing/rewriting on my part which should go quick. (I’m good at editing.)

All in all, I’m pleased with how my day went. Because of the stress I am under I had heartburn. It was major. It felt like the stomach acid entered my bronchi and burned them. My chest felt on fire. So, I got some antacids from a colleague of mine. (I actually had to walk to the shop to buy it.) They worked, but now the heartburn is back.

I’m having fun writing poems and posting them on here. I love poetry and am grateful that I am finally able to express myself through it even though they aren’t all good. Practice makes perfect, right?

Today one of the senior staff members was in the lab at my university. I didn’t see the person. But, I felt so ashamed. What will I say if I meet my professor by chance and not on my terms? Now I am determined to set things right and invest my time.

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